I don't really have any favorite Shakespeare, alas, aside from the bit where the witches are making soup for the potluck. So, instead, I'll post the perl script that let's me insert Shakespearean-style insults into IRC.
#!/usr/local/bin/perl @ADJ_1 = ("artless", "bawdy", "beslubbering", "bootless", "churlish", "cockered", "clouted", "craven", "currish", "dankish", "dissembling", "droning", "errant", "fawning", "fobbing", "froward", "frothy", "gleeking", "goatish", "gorbellied", "impertinent", "jarring", "loggerheaded", "mangled", "mewling", "paunchy", "pribbling", "puking", "qualling", "reeky", "roguish", "ruttish", "saucy", "spleeny", "spongy", "surly", "tottering", "unmuzzled", "vain", "venomed", "villainous", "warped", "wayward", "weedy", "yeasty"); @ADJ_2 = ("base-court", "bat-fowling", "beef-witted", "beetle-headed", "boil-brained", "clapper-clawed", "clay-brained", "common-kissing", "crook-pated", "dismal-dreaming", "dizzy-eyed", "doghearted", "dread-bolted", "earth-vexing", "elf-skinned", "fat-kidneyed", "fen-sucked", "flap-mouthed", "fly-bitten", "folly-fallen", "fool-born", "guts-griping", "half-faced", "hell-hated", "idle-headed", "ill-breeding", "ill-nurtured", "knotty-pated", "motley-minded", "plume-plucked", "pottle-deep", "pox-marked", "reeling-ripe", "rough-hewn", "rude-growing", "rump-fed", "shard-borne", "sheep-biting", "spur-galled", "swag-bellied", "tardy-gaited", "tickle-brained", "toad-spotted", "unchin-snouted", "weather-bitten"); @NOUN = ("apple-john", "baggage", "barnacle", "bladder", "boar-pig", "bugbear", "bum-bailey", "canker-blossom", "clack-dish", "clotpole", "coxcomb", "codpiece", "death-token", "dewberry", "flap-dragon", "flax-wench", "flirt-gill", "foot-licker", "fustilarian", "giglet", "gudgeon", "harpy", "hedge-pig", "joithead", "lewdster", "lout", "maggot-pie", "malt-worm", "measle", "miscreant", "moldwarp", "mumble-news", "nuthook", "pigeon-egg", "pignut", "puttock", "pumpion", "ratsbane", "scut", "skainsmate", "strumpet", "varlet", "vassal", "whey-face", "wagtail"); $x = int rand $#ADJ_1 + 1; $y = int rand $#ADJ_2 + 1; $z = int rand $#NOUN + 1; print "Thou $ADJ_1[$x], $ADJ_2[$y] $NOUN[$z]!\n";