May 8th, 2002


Bus report

Today's subject is gravity.

In the last few weeks, I've had one gentleman, while boarding via the rear door, fall straight backwards and attempt to put a dent in the sidewalk with his head (requiring paperwork); an intoxicated gentleman who, after taking two steps away from the bus, fell over and hit the side of the bus on the way down (requiring paperwork) and an elderly gentleman who tripped over a bit of sidewalk and fell on his ass trying to get a bus he was late for (no paper work this time).

My theory is that the City Gravity department is having "rolling dropouts" due to a large gravity consortium interfering with the supply.

Why am I telling you this? Because I want you to be careful, Dummy! Don't fall over, stay healthy and (most importantly) don't cause me to fill out reams of tedious paperwork because you're a klutz.

Thank you.